Taken by surprise…

In my last updates post, I briefly spoke about a girl who I spoke to at my Christmas party and “gave her the time of day.” Well against all odds, we’ve been talking quite a bit and we randomly ended up sleeping together the other day. I’m always cautious with work situations because they’re basically a subversion of nature, it’s a situation drained of all sexuality and that’s not me, I’m a flirty guy even if it’s just a conversation. So anyway this girl from work, we whatsapp quite a bit, she’s feisty but cool. I like her, in fact I dare say we actually have great chemistry, which is not something I come across like ever. I think last year I met 3 girls that I would say that I clicked with, which I would define as a girl who has got my attention and I genuinely want to get to know her better beyond the physical. Frankly with most girls, I just don’t care about their day or what they’re doing in their life, I want to say it’s sad but it’s not. It’s just how it is. Now I’d say with this girl Alex, that it’s like a step above clicking. It’s like a throwback to the days when I’d get excited when a girl I liked sent me a message and it’s nice to feel something for once. Thankfully though, after everything else that I’ve been through, I’m not going to make any rash decisions. I think rationally about situations like this now and I’m not going to end up in a relationship or something like that, I don’t want to. I’d rather let it go than end up doing something like that. So we slept with each other for the first time the other day and technically we haven’t been on a date yet, I mean I took her out for a few drinks, well we basically just got drunk and went dancing which she loved. Then the other night she half invited me over after I’d been out drinking, so it was like the second time we met outside of work. On a side note to that, I generally have no idea of telling how chaste most girls are based on how quickly I sleep with them because I seem to bed girls pretty easily. I actually want to write a post on that one day, maybe I’ll mix it with a post to do with contraception too because I feel like there’s a correlation between a few of these things but I haven’t properly thought about it. So yeah, slept with her on the second time of asking so to speak, I left her in a bed at 6:30am…baller.

I also have the slight problem of having to break things off with Adele who is pushing for a relationship, she has said as much and I skated past the second real proposal of commitment. I’m so glad that I’m strong enough to do that now because maybe a few years ago I would have relented even though I didn’t want to. I can’t say how well she’ll take it because I’ve never pissed her off before but we’ll see. Adele is the perfect example of a girl I find attractive, get on okay with but it was never going anywhere but she felt it was and I think if she really sat down and thought about it, she’ll know that we were never going to be anything but it might take her a few months to realise that.

My 2017 stats

New girls: 21

New countries: Poland, Romania, Slovakia, Hungary, Malaysia, Austria, Finland, Denmark and Sri Lanka

Near misses:

  • One due to a period(Russian girl)
  • Another due to a cockblock friend who decided to not handle his booze.
  • A couple of LMRs, had half of my cock in one and had the other half naked in bed
  • Had a girl ready bang in a bar toilet but security caught us. Then I had to leave with my boys.


  • In my first night in Budapest, sneaking out of bed after banging an 18 year old Hungarian girl and going on a 10 minute walk to a Moroccan girls house and trying it on with her too. Then sneaking back to my apartment and railing the Hungarian in the morning again.
  • Banging an ex Mormon cam girl
  • Banging my third MILF and continued my MILF m.o. of fake tits, tight bodies and dirty.
  • Banging a girl who spoke zero English.

Lessons learnt:

  • If you own your shit and do what you want, it’s amazing what you can get away with. That’s why a strong frame is one of the best indicators of a strong man.
  • When you have standards, you get better results in most areas of your life.
  • Girls see me as a bad boy so there’s no real need to play up to it.
  • Keep having fun and dodge that old ball and chain.


Hopefully the next 12 months will be as fruitful as the last, I think this year I want to focus more on quality. That’s not just in terms of looks but in how I feel when I’m around the girl. I find myself getting bored quickly and I’m not completely sure why that is but I’ll see if I can find out.


Usually when I drink I wake up the next day feeling depressed, well this only happens when I end up drinking heavily. I know this is common and it’s a natural response to alcohol. However, due to the time of year I have been out drinking a lot so this has been happening a lot more. I’ve neglected the gym, I’ve just been out socialising and haven’t even had the chance to meet that many girls and in general I just feel off. I turned 25 not too long ago and it’s really got me thinking about where I’m going to be in 5 years time. I want to be earning more money, that’s my number one and two priority right now, I feel my interest in women is kinda going through a dip. I still hit on girls occasionally and I’m still seeing Adele, interestingly enough we’re coming up to the 3 month mark and she sent me a not so subtle message today about me having competition. I don’t really care.

Anyway I could bang on about work and my life in general and maybe I will in another post but this blog is mainly about banging chicks, I’m not going to pretend it’s something it’s not. So this month I have had no new girls, in fact I had no new girls in November either…and I don’t care! It’s actually kinda good to not be a complete slave to the numbers, I kinda feel that now I’m at 80 odd, I have little to prove to myself anyone. I’ve found myself becoming a lot more discerning and taking far less crap, especially since I’ve been seeing Adele more and go out less on weekends which has definitely influenced that. However, that being said, I’m not going to be exclusive with her, I have slept with a few other regular girls in the past two months and have had a few near misses. I got a blowjob off some Russian chick at the weekend but she was on her period and was not up for the bloodbath. I’ve had a few work functions too and had girls and older women getting a little brave but it’s all fun and games. It’s funny how the media would have you think that Christmas parties are just men going around groping women but my experience has been the opposite. I’ve had various women of various ages doing what I could only call “stupid drunken flirting” and making themselves look a bit stupid. Naturally, I played it off well and out of all these girls, I’ve given one the time of day because I’d seen her around the building before and she’s hot.

In general though, I’m not happy with where I am with girls, I’ve had too many false starts recently and I can only attribute it to seeing too much of this one girl and a bunch of other stuff which isn’t exactly connected but it’s been fucking with my vibe. Also in regards to the chick from my last post, I haven’t actually seen her since I posted it for various reasons and I have sent her one message, which she didn’t reply to so that situation is dead. I have some ideas about what I’m going to do next year that are chick related but I’ll keep them to myself for now.

Field Report: The Princess Conundrum

Haven’t really updated for a while, I’ve been busy and out living my life rather than worrying about updating this, which I’m happy about. So Adele is still in rotation, I like her, she likes me, she spend Friday night over and we chilled. I’ve got my other fuck buddies who I rotate so I see them once every 3 weeks in order to ensure longevity. Familiarity breeds contempt. It’s all on my terms so I’m happy.

So I have a new girl that I’m going after, I will call her Woody because I actually call her that in real life as a nickname. We’ve met a few times through our social circle a few times, the first time we met it was at a day long event and I’m flirting with her and a couple of the other girls getting a feel for what happening. I’m flirting with Woody, she’s into me and saying some of the right things but I actually end up making out with her flatmate that night, who probably equally as good looking but less my type. However, before this I was chatting to Woody but she wouldn’t kiss me, she was giving positive signals but wouldn’t go further than that so I asked her out, she gave me her number. So I message her a few days later and she fluffs some bullshit and eventually starts screening my texts and not replying. That’s no bother to me, I have other girls so onto the next one…

A couple of weeks later, which was last weekend, we were out and she was there again. This is one example of where being in the community really helped me, I just knew I had to completely ignore the fact that she had blanked my texts and act normal. I actually flirt more with her flatmate that early on but as the night grows on I’m chatting more and more to Woody, I’m not even particularly flirting with her that much but she starts telling me she thinks I’m good looking and whatever but she has no intention of getting with anyone in our group because she had recently ended something with a guy that we all know, like we see him often enough kinda guy. So I’m like whatever, it’s getting late and we’re outside a club waiting to get in and I’m not feeling so I tell her we should knock it on the head and get some food, she agrees. We end up back at hers, make some food and whatever…and I end up staying the night in her bed, nothing happens. At one point I message a mate of mine and said “I can’t believe I’m staying over at this girls house and nothings happening, this is a fucking travesty, I’ve lost my touch.” It wasn’t actually a shitty moment but usually I would have just left but I had to be up early and I live about an hour away at that time of night. I stay over, we banter a bit but there was definitely nothing sexual going down that night.

So later this past week, we all went out again and she rocks up and we fucking hit off straight away. She’s actually got her friend from abroad with her but she’s just talking to me. I’m asking her outrageous questions and she’s eating it all up. Later we go to a club and trying to hold my hand, telling me how attractive I am and all that but how she still can’t do anything even though she really wants to. At this point I’m thinking, is it worth the effort, I don’t want anything serious and I know she doesn’t but it’s getting to that point where she’s making a thing which I’m not falling for. So I have to leave to get home and she’s begging me not to go, hiding my coat and playing silly games, I staying stoic as shit. It was the classic, girl is the storm, running around with her emotions but I’m the tree with the strong roots and not budging. I tell her to come upstairs to see me off and she hesitates. I realised she is worried I’m going to take her upstairs and try and seduce her outside. Earlier that night she had said that she actually sees me as a bad boy who is trying to get into her knickers and she only goes for nice guys. I tell her that I don’t think she’s been fucked properly and I could visibly see her start imagining things and this moment here where I’m walking up the stairs holding her hands was the start of that. She tells me that I’m such a bad influence on her, I tell her calm down I give her a hug, I’d promised not to kiss her and I don’t try even though I know she’d love nothing more than that. I tell her to come and see me at lunch during the week, she doesn’t work(she’s a proper princess, model mother and millionaire father) so she just fucks about she should spend that time with me.

As I write this, I haven’t messaged her yet but I did call her last night to arrange plans with friends and stuff like that but nothing flirty. I’m actually tempted to leave the lunch idea and wait until I see her again because she is a typical girl, flakey and kinda annoying about it but we’ll see. I could probably see her one evening this week socially. I think back now to where I was a couple of years and it’s crazy, just the level of girl is getting better, I just want more consistency with it. I find princess girls easier to seduce because they don’t want anything other than to feel good, they have their other needs met through their family so they don’t have the drive to climb the ladder especially in the 18-23 year age bracket. My other friends do not get it at all as I have no business with kinds of girls, like objectively they are well out of my league, I’m not good looking enough, I’m not rich but I know how to get myself into a good position with a chick.





Monogamy Monster: Part 3

This is obviously part 3, you can read part 1 and part 2 here.

As we speak today, I write this with the Monogamy Monster at bay and I have no desire to commit to any girl. However, I do enjoy, especially in the colder months have a regular thing with someone and then as the warmer months come, turn back into that adventurous vagabond. This winter is no different, I want to have the regularity without the commitment and it’s tough to have your cake and eat it too. It comes down to just being honest and not fucking anybody about and that goes both ways. I won’t let her hold me hostage to anything and I have no intention of hoodwinking her into something she hasn’t signed up for, women are crazy enough as it is, you don’t need to add fuel to the fire.

So what’s on my mind, basically I have two potential girls, neither of whom I would describe as girls that I click with but I enjoy spending time with them. So far the girl in the lead is the girl from this lay report simply because I like her more and she’s more consistent than the other girl, Karolina from this lay report(she’s the second one) and I actually had to say to her a few weeks ago that I’m not going to chase her because she was just shitty at getting back to me. That being said, she’s better this week but if I do keep seeing her, it’ll be just sex.

With Adele, I know I have to be careful, she’s already showing signs of potentially wanting more than I can give her. I don’t want to end up having a Hank Moody style break up, I’d rather nip that shit in the bud. In terms of signs, we have the birthday cake, it was a nice gesture but if we’re going to get gamey about it, it’s a fair bit of investment. Also this week, she “joked” about us going away somewhere, I don’t know how it even happened but she managed to shoehorn it into the conversation so I’m ready for whatever’s coming. I’m seeing her later today and I’m going to through out a few more feelers to see where her mindset is and work from there. I’ve come to realise there is no nice way to let someone down, so you just have to bite the bullet and get on with it, if it comes to it.

I think this will be the last Monogamy Monster post for a while but it’s an ongoing thing in my life so it’ll be back for sure.

Monogamy Monster: Part 2

Hello, as you can see this is part 2, so have a read of part 1 here.

When you’re seeing a girl but don’t want commitment, especially over an extended period of time, things get tricky. At some point most girls want commitment, that means they want you to stop banging other chicks and just see them. In my life, that’s just not happening. I’m 25, I’m not ready to cut my dick off from the rest of the world. Now I face the issue head on and just tell it how it is, that I’m not committing to anything and I don’t lying about it. However, as I’ve alluded to, I used to lie about it and that shit got messy. I’ve had death threats, cut your dick off threats and suicide threats/attempts(yep one girl actually ended up in hospital) all because I tried to skirt around issues. I think the first part of the problem is that I’m a sexy bastard and secondly that I’m hot and cold. The truth is, I’m frankly “meh” about most girls, it’s got little to do with her looks, it’s just unless she has that something that draws me in, I’ll happily bang her and string her along for months on end.

The first one I’m going to tell you about was an 18 year old Serbian girl. Side note, if you’ve never been to Serbia, go because the girl’s are fucking insane insanely hot. Anyway I met this girl over there on Tinder, we go on a date, it’s all good. I can tell she’s into me, we go for some food and a stroll down the Sava, it was lovely evening and I knew she was really into me. My apartment was a 5 minute walk away, I’ve already made out with her at this point, walk her back and she refuses to come in. Pretty standard. Eventually she agrees to come in but she’s not taking her shoes off. A lot of hassle, I get her into bed, nearly bang her but she’s not having it but she gives me a blowjob then leaves because her dads calling her. She naturally blows up my phone, can’t stop calling, I’m not even in Serbia anymore. She tells me that she’s a virgin and it all makes sense now. I entertain the calls for a bit and she’s coming to London pretty soon and she’s telling me that she wants me to take her virginity. She comes to London and I’m pretty unsure of what I should do because I’m convinced she’s in love with me and things could get messy(listen to your gut) but she initiated things quickly when we met again and we had sex. She was in town for a few days so we met a few times, it was good, she was calling herself my little slut. Fun times. Then one day, she tells me she wants more and that she wants me to be her boyfriend. This is where I lie because it’s fucking easy right, I figured I’ll say yes and then end it later citing distance being a struggle. What can go wrong? Well it was fine for a few weeks, she went home and I just kept her sweet.

One major problem, I had fucked her raw(I made sure I didn’t cum in her) and around that time I had also fucked another random girl from Tinder raw and that girl had given me chlamydia. These things happen and I was just happy it wasn’t anything more serious(again trust your gut because I was seriously unsure about that girl). At this point I wasn’t sure who gave it to me so I had to inform all the girls I’d barebacked in the last 6 months that they might be at risk(I’m not that much of a dick not to tell them but I have friends who have kept it to themselves) and the results were not pretty. I should screenshot all the messages and put them on here because I had to tell like 9/10 girls and…yeah it was awkward. One girl had a boyfriend and decided to tell him before getting tested…amateur stuff. Another girl just said “Hey. Fuck you.” and that was the end of that one. The only one that was pretty chill about it was a doctor, go figure. Anyway this Serbian girl did not take it well, was absolutely mad and I don’t blame her for it. Turns out she didn’t have it and her doctor told her that if I had it, she most definitely would have got it so I had to have got it after sleeping with her. So she’s worked out I’ve fucked someone else, goes crazy and literally loses her mind. What she did next actually really annoyed me even though I shouldn’t have been that bothered and I should say that I did actually quite like this girl, I just didn’t think a long distance thing would work. Another case of different circumstances, different result. Anyway, so she tells me she’s going to fuck someone else and I’m pretty dismissive about it, not bothered.

Ooo a snapchat message

So one day, I’m sitting at work and get a video message from her, I open it and it’s a video of some girl getting fucked by some guy with a huge cock. I thought it was weird until closer inspection and I realised it was her. That got my attention and actually pissed me off. I left it for a bit, she told me she’s glad she got her revenge, it meant nothing and she wanted to “get back together.” I called her a whore and all that, lost it and told her about all the other girls I’d fucked in Serbia. This really hurt her and she threatened to tell her dad what happened and have him send some heavies round, I mean she knew where I lived and she was one of those rich Serbians. The threat was idol but still left that lingering thought in the back of my mind. As of today, I’ve forgotten about the video and we occasionally talk to each other, she got a new boyfriend and randomly sent me a few pictures telling me how much better looking he is than me. I laughed. I think it was her that made me realise that you can’t lie and fuck with people’s feelings because it makes them do things they don’t want to do. She was the coolest girl for the longest time until she cracked and she told me how much she regretted sleeping with that other guy who had been chasing her for months.

One example, I have more but they will be more fitting with different subjects. Until next time guys, keep on fucking.

Monogamy Monster: Part 1

It’s Saturday morning in London, as usual the weather is shit and I’m in work but luckily I’m getting paid to do nothing so I thought I’d have a little bash at the keyboard. So I’m going to give you guys an insight into my mindset when it comes to monogamy and dealing with girls who end up wanting more. It’s something which I’ve had to pay more attention to over the last couple years because as I’ve got better, there are more girls who inevitably want to have more. I’ve had some pretty disastrous experiences, I’ve lied and hoodwinked girls into maybe thinking there was more in the future when there wasn’t but we’ll get into all that.

My last relationship ended in May 2015,  it was on and off for years, I had times when I was basically single but still sleeping with her and others. It was a mess. But I remember the break up well, we had finished university and the relationship and turned long distance because she wasn’t from this country. I went out with my friends and there was a new girl in the group and I fancied her a bit and as I sat there I realised that I couldn’t do anything with her and I wanted to. I knew all my friends wanted her and some of them had tried it on but I knew I could have her and about 6 months later I did actually get naked in bed but I was so drunk and whisky dick won that night. I didn’t get another chance.

I also didn’t enjoy the long distance aspect, I was a pretty bad boyfriend at the best of times, I’m not proud to say it but I cheated on her a lot and was pretty open about it to people around me. Now looking back, I’m ashamed of how I treated her and it was frankly a bit of sham, I also figured eventually she’d find out so I was living on borrowed time and I didn’t want to start a life with someone constantly looking over my shoulder. However, I did love the girl and enjoyed the good times we had together, I’d say some of the best moments in my life were with her. She was a good girl but I just wasn’t ready for a relationship that was heading towards the whole moving and starting a proper life together. I had some demons I needed to bury first. Basically I wanted to be free to shag lots of other women. Since that break up two and a half years ago I’ve shagged a fair few women, I’d put the number around 40-50 and I don’t regret anything. I still wake up with a smile on my face knowing that I’m single and I can do whatever I want, I owe nothing to anybody, I don’t have to pretend to be an upstanding boyfriend going to weddings and secretly wishing I can fuck the bridesmaids. I don’t have to divert my eyes so my girlfriend doesn’t catch me staring at the friend’s ass or anything like that. Now I see girls on my terms, I fuck them and decide whether I want more or not, I can take a month of girls and concentrate on other things knowing that I can find new girls and start again.

Over the average year, I probably meet around 2-3 girls that I feel like I genuinely click with and given different circumstances, I’d probably pursue something further with them. This year there has been 2 so far, I’ve really liked these two girls, they are very different people. The first was basically a party girl I met on Tinder, we chatted for a while and actually weren’t going to be in the same city for a month. I ended up banging her within half an hour of first meeting her. On paper I wouldn’t usually go for a girl like this, I know she has slept with a fair few guys, she’s obsessed with Instagram and that sort of thing(I refused to take any pictures for her) but eventually I got to know her better and she turned out to be pretty well rounded, she grew up in a really nice household and spends a lot of her time helping those less fortunate. She was really into me and it was mutual but we both knew that nothing would come of it so just enjoyed the time together. We’re not in the same place right now but she wants to spend next summer in London, she knows nothing will happen between us so it’s all good.

The other girl was the complete opposite and I broke one of my rules for her, which is never to date a girl from work. However, there were exceptional circumstances which is why I allowed it. I’d seen her around and thought she was hot but I work in a building with lots of hot girls so she was just another on the list. She actually started talking to me in a lift and I got off two floors before her but she got out and we continued chatting. All good, we stayed in touch, we went out and I wasn’t actually sure if she liked me or was just being friendly so I kissed her. Turns out she was into it but she was leaving the country the next week which sucked so we spent the whole week together. I know myself and occasionally I get that nagging feeling that I want a girlfriend, that week got rid of those feelings, I was able to project all of that on her. It was like a holiday romance except we would meet after work everyday, it was great, we got so well. Again, she’s thinking about moving back to London(nothing to do with me) so we’ll see how that goes. Ironically, these two girls are both 22, from Finland and come from towns about an hour apart. The Monogamy Monster hasn’t caught up with me yet but I can feel it knocking on the door occasionally and I need experiences like this, just short ones to keep it at bay.

In part 2, I’ll probably talk about all the various crazy girls I’ve dated and how that has all ended up.